Occupy Heart 10/25: Foundation for Collaboration - Occupy Cafe2024-03-28T17:33:31Zhttp://www.occupycafe.org/forum/topics/occupy-heart-10-25-inner-foundation-for-collaboration?commentId=6451976%3AComment%3A33690&feed=yes&xn_auth=noWhat a wonderful exchange! W…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-31:6451976:Comment:340452012-10-31T14:07:40.468ZBen Robertshttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/BenRoberts
<p>What a wonderful exchange! We discussed this on our Connect2012 call yesterday, where Dyck related how letting go of his reactivity and allowing himself to go with the assumption that he has something to learn from you, C.A., led to the post above, which he described as a revelation. He writes:</p>
<blockquote><p><span>Thanks to Bradfield's persistence I'm reminded of my need to be open to the fact that I'm prone to prejudice and must watch for it especially hidden in my little acts or…</span></p>
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<p>What a wonderful exchange! We discussed this on our Connect2012 call yesterday, where Dyck related how letting go of his reactivity and allowing himself to go with the assumption that he has something to learn from you, C.A., led to the post above, which he described as a revelation. He writes:</p>
<blockquote><p><span>Thanks to Bradfield's persistence I'm reminded of my need to be open to the fact that I'm prone to prejudice and must watch for it especially hidden in my little acts or comments. Of particular importance is self awareness of masked bias toward women because men have been 'in power' and have set, & are setting so many of the rules in the world.</span></p>
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<p>Meanwhile, I am deeply moved by the stories you tell, Dyck, of encountering your own prejudice in the instances of the sculpture by an obese girl and the article by a Mexican man. When I read posts displaying vulnerability, I feel very gratified that the work we have put into creating this conversation space has been valuable, both for its own sake and for what it demonstrates is possible going forward.</p>
<p></p> For collaboration to happen s…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-29:6451976:Comment:337852012-10-29T14:41:46.076ZDyck Dewidhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/DyckDewid
<p>For collaboration to happen surely, being honest and authentic is my bedrock. All else is interference or blockage.</p>
<p>How can I offer my truth when its part lie or cover? How can I be credible when I don't value and respect others? Yet, I have discovered in myself hidden prejudice that colored my views of people. </p>
<p>Years ago I cried in front of a customer, ashamed of my conflicted feelings when I discovered the strikingly beautiful piece sculpture in the back yard was made by…</p>
<p>For collaboration to happen surely, being honest and authentic is my bedrock. All else is interference or blockage.</p>
<p>How can I offer my truth when its part lie or cover? How can I be credible when I don't value and respect others? Yet, I have discovered in myself hidden prejudice that colored my views of people. </p>
<p>Years ago I cried in front of a customer, ashamed of my conflicted feelings when I discovered the strikingly beautiful piece sculpture in the back yard was made by one of their very fat daughters. I had not thought fat people capable of producing such beauty. </p>
<p>And just last year I looked inward for why I was so surprised that an article that I thought was brilliant... was written by a Mexican man. I found my ugliness of not thinking the Mexican capable.</p>
<p>Both of these instances demonstrate that even as I think of myself as open, fair and without bias I am absolutely not immune of prejudice. Neither story actually involved gender though one was a man and the other a woman. But, having quite a lot of experience in 'mens work' I realize the likelihood that there is rampant hidden and open gender bias in our society... and it is mostly unintentional conditioning. </p>
<p>Certainly there was a time in my life I would not take orders from a woman because it seemed to threaten my manhood. Most or all of that's gone in me, I hope. Having an image to protect is not isolated to men and comes in all shapes and sizes. How can there be genuine collaboration when having an image and such hidden bias prevails? </p>
<p>Thanks to Bradfield's persistence I'm reminded of my need to be open to the fact that I'm prone to prejudice and must watch for it especially hidden in my little acts or comments. Of particular importance is self awareness of masked bias toward women because men have been 'in power' and have set, & are setting so many of the rules in the world.</p>
<p></p>
<p></p> I'll do it!
According to some…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:340302012-10-28T22:37:56.630ZShikhahttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/Shikha
<p>I'll do it!</p>
<p>According to some <strong>women's studies </strong>texts, the unprecedented aggression of the society's civilian <strong>women</strong> caused a belligerent uprising, involving the use of man's naturally greater physical strength; this rebellion marked the initiation of the society's current <strong>patriarchy</strong>.</p>
<p>I'll do it!</p>
<p>According to some <strong>women's studies </strong>texts, the unprecedented aggression of the society's civilian <strong>women</strong> caused a belligerent uprising, involving the use of man's naturally greater physical strength; this rebellion marked the initiation of the society's current <strong>patriarchy</strong>.</p> So, how will I see your beaut…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:340292012-10-28T22:13:34.450ZDyck Dewidhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/DyckDewid
<p><span style="text-decoration: line-through;">So, how will I see your beauty and your gifts when I speak of these things? </span> On second thought I won't ask that. I'll just do as you ask and allow things to happen as they will. </p>
<p>And since these terms don't come up naturally on every topic I'll treat this as though am conditioned against these gender issues. And I'll need to be actively watching for my biases of omission. </p>
<p>Am I getting the picture?</p>
<p><span style="text-decoration: line-through;">So, how will I see your beauty and your gifts when I speak of these things? </span> On second thought I won't ask that. I'll just do as you ask and allow things to happen as they will. </p>
<p>And since these terms don't come up naturally on every topic I'll treat this as though am conditioned against these gender issues. And I'll need to be actively watching for my biases of omission. </p>
<p>Am I getting the picture?</p> I am sensing that my real job…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:337822012-10-28T19:49:21.725ZDyck Dewidhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/DyckDewid
<p>I am sensing that my <em>real</em> job here is to see your beauty, and acknowledge your gifts, Bradfield.</p>
<p>I am sensing that my <em>real</em> job here is to see your beauty, and acknowledge your gifts, Bradfield.</p> I think, barely keeping up, t…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:338502012-10-28T19:38:38.631ZPawel Klewinhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/PawelKlewin
<p>I think, barely keeping up, that we are all here to collaborate on the way out of global confusion...:-)</p>
<p>I think, barely keeping up, that we are all here to collaborate on the way out of global confusion...:-)</p> Sorry Pawel, getting a little…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:340272012-10-28T18:48:25.305ZDyck Dewidhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/DyckDewid
<p>Sorry Pawel, getting a little confused here. My old mind can barely keep up... and right now its still on our most recent postings today. This won't be there much longer either. Good thing I don't have to deal with anything important. (that's a joke by the way).</p>
<p>Sorry Pawel, getting a little confused here. My old mind can barely keep up... and right now its still on our most recent postings today. This won't be there much longer either. Good thing I don't have to deal with anything important. (that's a joke by the way).</p> Reply by Dyck Dewid 21 hours…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:339392012-10-28T18:32:31.247ZPawel Klewinhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/PawelKlewin
<p>Reply by <a href="http://www.occupycafe.org/forum/topic/listForContributor?user=1nq6mckq5c20v">Dyck Dewid</a> 21 hours ago:</p>
<blockquote><p>***I wouldn't mind some time going into how actions would differ when derived from a focus of 'All Connected' versus 'We Against They" attitude.</p>
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<p>Reply by <a href="http://www.occupycafe.org/forum/topic/listForContributor?user=1nq6mckq5c20v">Dyck Dewid</a> 21 hours ago:</p>
<blockquote><p>***I wouldn't mind some time going into how actions would differ when derived from a focus of 'All Connected' versus 'We Against They" attitude.</p>
</blockquote> Hi Pawel, I want to comment a…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:339382012-10-28T18:00:05.030ZDyck Dewidhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/DyckDewid
<p>Hi Pawel, I want to comment about what you asked... "But show me the link to your common agenda please!"</p>
<p>If you're truly sincere, or better yet you're longing with all your heart, as I am, to 'know' our common bond**... (re your stmt.) Then, I would be happy to inquire into it with you and others. If however, there is no longing in you to know right now, then I would have no energy to go into it. </p>
<p>Without someones sense of longing or urgency, I would simply apply "there is a…</p>
<p>Hi Pawel, I want to comment about what you asked... "But show me the link to your common agenda please!"</p>
<p>If you're truly sincere, or better yet you're longing with all your heart, as I am, to 'know' our common bond**... (re your stmt.) Then, I would be happy to inquire into it with you and others. If however, there is no longing in you to know right now, then I would have no energy to go into it. </p>
<p>Without someones sense of longing or urgency, I would simply apply "there is a season for all things under the sun" (metaphor season = readiness) appropriately. I don't know about humble, but we're all strangers under the same sun. Yet, if some strangers would be in 'other' worlds that know no seasons, or have longer seasons and die first, maybe this doesn't apply.</p>
<p>Regarding your other comment, I don't think I am mentally capable to clarify or even remember what I said about "...the same different actions as Dyck mentions?" you asked about. Sorry.</p>
<p>** I use the term to 'know' in a holistic way. It implies the direct not abstract experience (gestures, sensation) that demonstrate no separation between the thought and the action. "Knowing is in the bones."</p> Richard, your views have been…tag:www.occupycafe.org,2012-10-28:6451976:Comment:338482012-10-28T17:05:37.982ZDyck Dewidhttp://www.occupycafe.org/profile/DyckDewid
<p>Richard, your views have been stirring me also... First I react, but then there's quite a long process of examination... not just a critical one, but one that wants to learn something (I obviously need to learn) that furthers my somewhat hidden visceral purpose-- to be happy. This mostly includes being on a shared beautiful earth with others in a world that is nice (kind, compassionate, loving, just, connected, harmonious...) and in this eliminate the suffering. </p>
<blockquote><p>Your…</p>
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<p>Richard, your views have been stirring me also... First I react, but then there's quite a long process of examination... not just a critical one, but one that wants to learn something (I obviously need to learn) that furthers my somewhat hidden visceral purpose-- to be happy. This mostly includes being on a shared beautiful earth with others in a world that is nice (kind, compassionate, loving, just, connected, harmonious...) and in this eliminate the suffering. </p>
<blockquote><p>Your words Richard, "A mass of unorganized people is just a mob, and – as such – are easily countered. Notice what little effect the demonstrations by millions of people had in preventing the first Gulf War. During the lead up to the second Gulf War, I think we were too demoralized to even try. I've already submitted a suggestion for a network structure where all have equal authority."</p>
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<p>Its my experience when I look closely, that we get out of trouble the same way we got into trouble- in small steps. Yet I recognize our competitive conditioning to expect 'fast' pay off in a race to succeed. It baffles me how we can be affectionately critical of young people being so impetuous and impatient, while we older ones have intensified these traits in ourselves, applying them to now "more important" stuff and on a grander scale. </p>
<p>Patience, resolve, kindness... are parts of the 'inner' journey for me... to confront my illogical conditioning (my propulsions) that want immediate gratification (somehow blindly hoping that'll bring happiness). Honestly, right now I'm saying "Dyck, can you do what in your heart is right- be kind, be generous... and just wait for the world to 'get it' too? What gives me the resolve I need when there is no score and there seems endless & deep challenge? I don't know.</p>
<p>By the way... this process of sincere dialogue is the most challenging for me because it allows others to 'see' my conditioning... to see what I'm clinging-to as though I really know (the surer I am of something- the more chance its illusion). And they ask or confront me on it... even though they have it too (isn't that everybody's way of sneaking up on their own shit?). And I must (or have opportunity to) confront myself (my inner small self). </p>
<p>I'm trying, for all you attackers (tongue-in-cheek), to see your intention or to see awesome intelligence finding itself.</p>